As I was praying about what to write today, my tired mind was spinning... Or at least fogging over. Honestly, it has been a crazy day, a lot on my heart and in my head (don't worry, it's mainly all good things... apparently ministry is taxing work! Who knew, right?)
Anyway, God reminded me of a prayer that I wrote for myself in my journal during Prayer week about a month ago (it's only been a month? Feels like ten years!) I was compelled to open my heart and share it with the world.
Before I do, I need to set a bit of context: The foundational Scripture of our church at Christ Community is Ezekiel 47:9-- "So where the river flows, everything will live." It seemed pretty appropriate to bring back to my heart and share with you today.
Other Scriptures that we were charged to meditate on before this prayer came to me included Ezekiel 47:6-9, Jeremiah 2:10-13 and Isaiah 30:15-17.
PLEASE come in and change my heart. I know you are doing some incredible work in me and I pray that it continues, even if I sin through my worry, doubt, fear, lack of faith and tiredness as you do it. Help me to rest, not be expounding all of my energy to fight the enemy all by myself. Lord God, I can't do this without you... I know that the Holy Spirit gives us the weapons of warfare we need.
Lord, take me deeper. Take my floaties off and let me stop exhausting myself from treading water. Help me to know I don't need the floaties if I am floating down the river clinging to The Cross. Take away my fears. I lay them at your feet. Help me to SEE when I look. I want to flow with you to help bring life to the desert places.
I am so sorry for all of the times I have forsaken you and pursued things of this world. Help my faith drive my feelings and emotions, not the other way around.
THANK YOU for your continuous love. Thank you for being gracious, especially when I don't deserve it. Thank you for always being with me, even when my eyes are closed and I am running the other way fleeing from you. THANK YOU for showing me boundless compassion. Thank you for being just. Thank you for being our source, our one and only source of life.
Lord Father, fill me with your spirit, so I can live holistically and be a stronger witness for you as a wife, friend, patriot, intern, daughter and sibling. Thank you for always listening AND hearing as I continually ask, seek and knock when I am in the river. I love you and I praise you.
In your precious, Holy Son's name.
God has been taking me in deeper and deeper into the river since moving to Georgia, day by day, moment by moment. Even now as I read over this prayer, I can see every aspect of how he is putting this prayer answer into action. All that is swirling around me in a cloud of excitement/opportunity/glory is an answer to this prayer. Praise Jesus for takin' me swimming in the deep! I don't even have to hold my nose!
Are you ready to swim? Pray for Him to bring you deep into the river... Leave your floaties on the bank, take up the cross and follow Him!
Floating down the River,
"Then he led me back to the bank of the river. When I arrived there, I saw a great number of trees on each side of the river. He said to me, “This water flows toward the eastern region and goes down into the Arabah, where it enters the Sea. When it empties into the Sea, the water there becomes fresh. Swarms of living creatures will live wherever the river flows. There will be large numbers of fish, because this water flows there and makes the salt water fresh; so where the river flows everything will live. He asked me, “Son of man, do you see this?” -- Ezekiel 47:6-9